Rabbi Marc D. Rudolph

This Wednesday evening, Jews around the world will gather with family and friends to celebrate Passover. The tradition of the Seder stretches back two millennia, if not more. But what is its primary purpose? It may not be what we usually assume.

Rather than simply remembering the Exodus, the deeper purpose of the Seder is to teach our children to remember that they are Jewish. The Seder is a vehicle for planting indelible Jewish memories—memories that bind children to parents and grandparents, and through them to a lineage reaching back to Abraham and Sarah.

What our children ultimately do with those memories is beyond our control. Whether those memories shape their adult Jewish lives is not something parents can determine. Our children must live their own lives. Yet if we do our job well, they will carry their Jewish identity with them—even if they bury it, even if they struggle with it. And sometimes, that identity resurfaces in the most unexpected ways.

Here is a remarkable example.

A Black African woman and a white European rabbi stand before the grave of Walter Galler, born in London in 1885. The grave lies in a Christian cemetery in Namibia. The woman is his widow. “He would be so happy to know that a rabbi was visiting his grave,” she says, tears in her eyes.

The rabbi studies the tombstone and notices odd markings above the name. Looking closer, he realizes they are Hebrew letters—carved upside down and written left‑to‑right instead of right‑to‑left. And they spell: Kasher le‑Pesach — Kosher for Passover.

The widow explains that her husband had come from London many years earlier. They married, but he never mentioned being Jewish. Only on his deathbed did he reveal it. He took out a box of matzah he had kept for years, unopened—the only Jewish object he still possessed. Pointing to the Hebrew words on the box, he said, “Please engrave this on my tombstone.” Those were his final words.

No matter how far he traveled—geographically or emotionally—he could not forget that he was Jewish.

Memory is powerful. Passover is an entire holiday devoted to creating Jewish memories: memories that warm us with connection to family and tradition; memories that guide, inspire, and sometimes haunt us. The memories we carry from our Seders can shape who we become and how we move through the world.

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